…following strict rules doesn’t work!
I adore observing people and my own self. I love tracking the behavior and the reasons, the situations and the emotions which provoke it. I believe that the model we apply in one area of our life is applicable to everything else we do.
I think that we’ve mistakenly fallen to believe that what we need in order to achieve success in our career is completely different from what we need in order to be in better shape or in order to achieve another goal.
With every passing year, I observe my own personal development. I sincerely believe that a person has no duty to have the same convictions and act in the same way for the rest of his life. I think that life is in the dynamics. Life, by itself is not static and exactly our desperate try to approach it from a static view- i.e. without changing or adapting towards what is taking place around us, leads to a bunch of conflicts, which could be spotted in our behavior and the decisions we make.
In my opinion, almost everybody who takes the path towards a healthier lifestyle, initially makes a mistake, which “swallows” us in the enchanted circle of dissatisfaction and lack of results.
We think that health and being fit are a result from discovering something external- discovering the best diet, the best combination of foods, a workout structured in a particular way. Thus, by chasing the wrong goal, we take the road, where we encounter more obstacles and many of us get discouraged; many of us start believing that they are not good enough, that we do not have the premises to be who we want to become.
Personally, I went through a roundabout path, on my way towards a healthier lifestyle. I tried a bunch of diets and training methods, in order to realize that none of them works. I know that now you are thinking that I am in a big mistake. You will rush giving me examples about people, who are ripped and follow strict nutrition plans. I will ask you to hold on for a second and I will ask you- do you really believe that life is all about eating and training? Do you really believe, that being slaves of the clock and time, strict schemes and plans and living like machines, preprogrammed to act in a certain way, runs out the meaning of life?
Let me ask you, since when eating right after we wake up; right when we are done working out has become an obligation?
Humans are probably the only reasonable creature, who rarely uses his mind consciously and more often than not is led by habits and learned behavioral models.
I am sure that every one of you KNOWS how you are supposed to eat, how much you should move in order to achieve your goals and be in a better shape. The why do few manage to do it? Why few people listen to their body’s signals and the rest are trying to force their body to function up to a training or nutrition plan, which does not fit their own needs?
Actually, the truth is that many are incline to self-destructive behavior, because we do not love our own self. Just look around yourself! Do you see what I see? Wonderful women and often times men, who are obsessed with thoughts about their appearance, their weight, their size. People who are afraid of food, as if it is their enemy, and not a necessity, a fuel which give more life to the functional, capable thing we possess- our own body.
We do not love ourselves enough and this is reflected in each one of our actions. We think that we are not good enough and we are constantly punishing ourselves for it.
Do you think I am wrong? What is your attitude towards those you love? You are always trying to give your best for them- you choose the best cuts of meat, the best vegetables, you try to make their life easier so they can rest more and enjoy more. How often do you do this for yourself? Let me guess… NEVER! If you happen to do it, you feel guilt, because you think that you do not deserve it!
What makes you think you are not enough; that you do not deserve eating a whole steak, but instead you should cut it in three and fill the rest of your plate with veggies, so you don’t get fatter?
What makes you think that you don’t deserve skipping a workout and going to the park for a rest, when your body is screaming from exhaustion and this is being reflected in every single pan you have?
Day after day, I realize how our approach to being fitter is totally wrong.
Day after day I ask myself, why do we become slaves of the clock and why do we eat according to a schedule… and when something goes wrong, our ego is immediately feeling neglected and we feel anxiety and nervousness that we didn’t get to eat.
Since when, eating 5 times a day became an obligation? Do we really need it? Who said we should? Our body? Do you really believe that your body is feeling good on such a nutrition plan, when you keep in mind, that you keep on staring at the clock, every 30 minutes, scared that your next meal won’t come soon enough?
I don’t care if you are gonna be honest. I know how you feel- I’ve been there.
I wonder why do we need to split our meals in grams and calculate every bite, which is on our plate.
Isn’t it better if we eat twice a day, but by having a meal, we could have the freedom to feel pleasure from eating, without eating every bite, scared that it will stick to our butt or that it will disturb the “perfect” macronutrient ratio?
I’ve realized that following strict nutrition plans has nothing to do with being healthy. I realized that being a slave of the clock is far from healthy, because we are not just bodies, just an appearance. How does it matter if you have abs, when your mind is suffering and when you are feeling encaged in your own body? Does it really matter if the cage is golden or rusty? It will always be a cage!
It takes time, to realize that we can be who we want to become and look the way we wish, without searching for external sources, which will reveal us the secret to success!
It takes time to realize that what interferes with our goals, has to do with the fact that we’ve got distanced from nature and our own self; that we’ve stopped analyzing our own behavior and that every moment we should ask ourselves “WHY?”
Why am I eating? Because I am hungry or because this is what is written in my nutrition plan?
Why am I having dinner, when I do not feel hungry or why should I have breakfast right when I open my eyes, when my body is not giving me signals that it needs fuel?
Why would I cut the steak in two and eat it every two hours, instead of just eating the whole steak and then eating again in 5-6 hours?
Being mindless as become the norm and the engine of our robot-like behavior. We act by habits and every day is just a copy of the day before.
This is not life… this is just existence!
Today I want to tell you, that you deserve- to love and accept yourself. You deserve to take care of yourself and give the best to your body, your mind and your soul.
You deserve eating quality food, in the quantities your body needs- not in the quantities your plan dictates!
For some time, I am on a different stage of my personal development and even though this might lead to a conflict with my mind and hesitations, every now and then, I know that I am on my way to become free from schedules and plans.
I know that what every one of us needs is knowledge- knowing what we need; observing our own self and our own reactions and spotting which choice, which action is accelerating our progress and which is just keeping us busy, but not improving us.
I know that when a person knows, then he doesn’t need to search for something external or follow a particular scheme. When a person knows, then he is capable of eating more in one moment and then keep going without food for a longer period.
Because no matter how cliché it might sound, a person can be everything, when he accepts and loves himself. When we accept something, we have the freedom to change it. When we accept our own self, when we respect our own self, then we will start giving it what it needs and what makes it feel better.
Then we will realize that our body doesn’t feel good when we stuff it with foods, which do not come straight from nature.
The body doesn’t feel good when we force it to do cardio, in front of the TV, between the walls of a building.
Our body doesn’t feel good, when we give it more food than it can digest.
Our body doesn’t feel good when we give it less food, than it needs.
Our body doesn’t feel good when we fight with it, but it feels good when we move in synchrony with it.
I am gonna ask you to close this post. Forget everything you’ve read and listen to what your body needs. Then you won’t make mistakes and slowly but surely, the more you trust your own self, the faster you will eyewitness your own, miraculous transformation- both inner and outer.
You can! Just stop searching for reasons why you can’t and find the way to make it happen!
Thank you for sharing this article through the social buttons below. Let it reach more people like us- people who need to know that they have soul-mates and a support- even though virtually.
Don’t forget to download my FREE E-Book- 30 Exercises on Becoming a Wonder Woman.