It was one of these cold days- seemed as if the sky was suffering for something and the tears of rain were trickling down the window of her room. Was she trying to be sympathetic to the weather, or the weather was trying to be understanding to her- anyways the tears were trickling down her cheeks. They were just an outer expression of what was happening inside her soul.
Once again a memory from the past, had fallen out, like an old cut from a magazine- a magazine which you have forgotten, and on one of these afternoons, you felt as if it was screaming from the shelves of the library. You reach out and take the magazine. The cut sneaks out from the pages. Seems as if it was taking advantage of the moment, as a desperate try to escape from the oblivion, that was squeezing it among the pages of the old, useless magazine.
There are such moments, when the memories from the past sneak out- in a desperate try to run away from the cage, where we locked them and then threw in the furthest corner of our souls.
Memories, which return from oblivion and sate the present moment with their presence. Memories, which carry with them the sour taste of past emotions, which we wouldn’t want to experience anymore.
There are moments, when the memories from the past, return in our present. Memories which we are desperately trying to project in the present moment, so we can experience them again or so we can once again meet people, who used to be part of them- to invite them in our present and write a new story of your relationship.
A story, where no matter the hardships that “the characters” face, through the pages of their life, the feeling of security, the feeling of love and completeness are not gonna be ruined, but just strengthened after each obstacle.
The moments when you wish you could grab the memory, to make time stop and then lengthen it- just so you can give yourself one more opportunity, a couple more stolen moments, when you could see where everything went wrong.
Moments, when your life looks like a clock on the wall, where every moment is a passing second; every moment is just the fierce trotting of the arrows, for which there is no way back.
Your life is slowly, but rhythmically trickling down the face of the clock, and you wish you could stop it. You wish everything could just freeze to its place, exactly in that moment, so you could have the opportunity to stay there forever.
Just like the dead stop clock on the wall, has no value, thus a standstill life loses its meaning. Past moments, have their purpose, but it is far from clenching in them; far from trying to capture them and never allowing them to leave.
Just like the arrows of the clock, are slowly but rhythmically spinning forward, thus life is following a similar rhythm. Everything in life is cyclic and nothing that has life, and energy which moves it, couldn’t be static. Everything should leave the starting point, so it can pass the whole path, so it can make a full circle and then return back.
The sliding of the arrows on the face of the clock, is the accumulation of time.
The cycle of life, the accumulation of days, months and years, is actually the accumulation of meaning.
The past is not the place, where we should return, so we can stay there. The past, in the way we remember it, is just an illusion drawn by our inclination to twist the memory and give it emotions and meaning, that it doesn’t possess.
The more we allow ourselves to run away from the present, returning to the false feeling of security in the past, the more energy we give a time, that doesn’t exist and time that will never exist.
The past can’t be a source of happiness in the present moment; nor can it be a mean to pursue our present desires and longings.
The past is the part of us, which leaves footprints for who we used to be and where we have arrived.
This doesn’t matter, that we should go back in the past and derive our present identity from the situations that took place in the past; from people who used to be a part of our life or the actions that we used to take.
The infinite dimensions of the past, are a really unstable surface, to step on and to rely on it for building our present, striving to fulfill the longings for the future.
The arrows of the clock, are slowly but rhythmically sliding forward, so they can make a full cycle- but they always have one base point, in the middle of the face of the clock, which never changes its place or its time.
The life of a person is slowly and rhythmically sliding through the years and the accumulation of time is accumulation of meaning- but life always have one base point; a center which is left unchanged- and it is our own self.
When we realize that a person, as a separate personality, is his own center and that everything in the world spins around that center, then we will get out of the inclination to be dependent and to desperately search a center, a base point, placed outside of us; we will give up the inclination to become dependent on people or situations, which can not give us what we truly need… because it can be found just inside of us!
Don’t forget to download my FREE E-Book- 30 Exercises on Becoming a Wonder Woman. Download it HERE.
P.S. If you liked this post, please take a minute and share it with your friends! I’d greatly appreciate it!
Don’t forget to join my Facebook page! Thank you!
And one picture from yesterday 🙂