I have stopped saying “I can’t” as in, “I can’t eat that ….”
What I say, and mean, is: “I choose not to eat that”.
“I choose not to eat that” gives me power!
I am in control of what I put into my body. I have made a conscious choice and I decide every second what I want. I am not passive, or swept away by emotion or helpless under duress or temptation.
I’ve noticed that the self talk part is really important. It either sets you for success or it sets you for failure! If you constantly tell yourself how you can’t eat cookies because you are on a diet, you can’t go to Mc Donald’s because you are trying to lose weight and so on, you are actually making a big deal out of your eating. You are putting some limitations, and your mind is constantly bothered by that. It is constantly trying to force you to break your rules and give in to the temptation.
You know how when you were little it was really tempting to reach for the knife, when your mother was constantly yelling at you “You can’t use the knife, you are too young!” There is something about the word can’t which somehow triggers the strong desire to actually do it!
Besides that when somebody asks you to take a chocolate and you answer with “No, thanks! I can’t. I am on a diet.”, that puts you in a position where you feel weak. It is like your diet controls you. It is like you are doing something against your will that is torturing you, depriving you and making you feel miserable!
My observations show me that people who have personality issues, have bad relationship with food. When you put yourself in a situation where you feel deprived and miserable, you are strengthening that self-hate issue and you are not contributing to a positive change in your habits!
On the other hand when you are determined and you believe in your actions, you take control of the situation. In this case when somebody asks you to grab a piece of cake, your answer would be something like “No, thank you! I do not eat cake!” That looks more like a conscious choice. A choice that is the result of your desire to change, your desire to live healthier and better. It is the answer that shows, that healthy living is your decision and not an obligation that is just making your life worse!
Like every other change in your life, in order for it to have a positive outcome, the decision should be yours! It should be a product of your inner motivation and desire to be better, to live better! When we believe in what we do, we feel empowered. We find strength, that keeps us going! We find power, which gives us the confidence that we control things and it is up to us if we fail or if we succeed!
That is why I dare you to make a decision! How bad do you want to be fit? How bad do you want to get rid of that terrible sluggish feeling? How bad do you want to feel energized and alive? Or probably it would be better to ask you….Do you really want that or are you just trying to fit in common convictions?