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Your Body Speaks: The Relationship I Ignored

 

Another morning, when there isn’t even a hint for the sunrise. Yet, I am already in the gym and I am waiting for one of the wonderful women that I coach. She is always late with 5-10minutes, but I am not mad at her. She gives me some more time from the early morning, when I get to stay with myself and my own thoughts. I use the time for my favorite mobility exercises and for another monolog with myself.

I was thinking how useful is growing older and adding more years to your life. Nothing could compare with the energy of the young, but nothing could compare with the lack of knowledge and sometimes stupidity of the youth.

I was thinking, how from the position of an elder person, you could make less effort, yet achieve bigger goals. It is just that life and experience teach you what are the consequences of some actions and when it is worth to give your best effort and when you could save some.

I was thinking about relationship – but not the one between people. I was thinking about the relationship with your own self and your own body. I realize that most of our problems come from the fact that we do not know our own body. Even when it whispers how it feels and what it needs, we keep ignoring it and we believe our own projection – what we suppose is happening or what we suppose should happen.

I am sure that I have so much more to learn, but still through the last couple years, I earned a lot of information about my body, its needs and how it reacts in different situations. Sure, there are still those days when it tells me something, yet I do what I intended to do… later on I am mad at it that it doesn’t function or doesn’t look the way I want it to be.

But when you are in a relationship, there should be a mutual understanding. You should take into account the needs and preferences of both sides. It is neither egoism, nor altruism that leads to happiness. The first one takes you further away from the other person, and the second one completely erases your personality.

The same is true for the relationship with our own body.

I started getting the results I wanted, just when I started tracking my body and the way it reacts. Back in the days, I was always forcing it to function on a particular diet or training program. It didn’t like it and it didn’t react well – one day my knee was screaming from pain, on the other day it was my lower back. Some days my stomach was screaming from hunger, on the next day it was hurting from food indulgence. But there was nobody to listen – that is what they told me I am supposed to do and that is what I was doing.

Later on I realized that in a relationship you shouldn’t listen to other people. They make conclusions based on their personal experience and they project on your relationship, what is familiar to them. But they do not know anything about you – what they know is just for them. The same is true for the relationship with the body. Other people don’t know anything about me and my body. They do not know what it is capable of, or what could break it down. They do not know what it has overcome or how many times I left it injured and aching, because I abused it. They don’t know what it prefers and they do not understand why it needs a fresh carrot, when it is not written on my diet or why it needs a couple cups of coffee, when everybody keeps telling me that I shouldn’t drink more than two. We have been together for so long. We have gone through so much and we have a mutual appreciation for each other and for our strangeness – it is not mad at me that I wanna be a star athlete and I am not mad at it, that it needs to be healthy, fed and rested. Well, there was a moment when we had some disagreements, but after all this is how bonds get stronger – with mistakes, arguments, learned lessons and with just one more chance.

But I wanted to share with you something else. I wanted to tell you that you need to give a chance to your body – to know it and not be mad at it. Don’t you even dare be mad at it, when you say you will work out and it says it needs to rest; when you say that you shouldn’t eat sweets today and it is dying to eat a piece of chocolate; when you shouldn’t eat fats and the thought of an omelet with bacon doesn’t leave your thoughts.

As time went by, I learned that every preference, is usually a biological drive. It is a result of the fact that I haven’t listened to my body and I have deprived it of something – sometimes it is rest, sometimes it is food.

What did I learn about myself and my own body?

I learned that:

every time when I do not get to sleep enough, on the next day I need more food and I will crave more carbs. What do I do then? Do I resist that urge? No, I expect it and I prepare for it. When I wake up I prepare a bigger food portion with a solid amount of good fats and a delicious carb source (something that I prepare myself). Thus, it is just one bigger meal that neutralizes everything and then I feel great throughout the whole day. My cravings disappear and I am at my best.

-every times when I overdo it with carbs I need more water and a fermented food. What do I do? In this case I take a couple sips from my homemade apple vinegar and 2-3 digestive enzymes.

every time when I overdo it with protein, I need homemade bone broth. What do I do? I buy bones with marrow and I prepare it.

every time when I feel tired, I need a cold shower and an hour for myself – for yoga, stretching, massage with a tennis ball and just some peace for my mind.

every time when I swim or when I ride my bike for a longer distance, I need more carbs… on the next day. Do I resist eating them? No! I just expect it and I plan more carbs, from quality sources.

-every time when I do 5-8RM deadlifts, on the next day I feel extremely tired. Do I force myself to train? No! I just plan a lighter day and I just walk or stretch.

every time when I travel and train after that… I injure myself. Do I force myself to train? No! I take a rest day and I just walk more, take care for my hip flexors and I do more mobility drills.

every time I take one cocoa nib…I will eat a second one and a third one… 😀

I could keep writing forever. But these are the secrets between me and my body. It is our relationship. Why should I bother you with us? You have your own relationship – take care of it!

If you liked this post or if it makes you think deeper about the relationship with your body – share it. Somebody might find something helpful about his own relationship!

And here are some videos from my last yoga practices:

Ines Subashka
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Ines Subashka

Certified Personal Trainer at Inspired Fit Strong
Ines Subashka
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